Last night I had a dream again, about this crush I had back in elementary school.

It was quite funny, because he was wearing this high school uniform and in my dream, we ran into each other on the street and said hi. It was a good and warm feeling.

 

Don't get me wrong, I don't think I have feelings for him anymore.

But i guess because he was my first crush and my feelings were never made known, psychologically speaking, maybe I had this regret or 遗憾 hidden in me that sometimes it would come out to haunt me.

 

Humans are funny, we always tend to put more value in things that we miss or are unable to get. Is it in our genes that we tend to pursue things/people that we presume to be better. And if they are better, how will we ever be up to their pars. And same goes to others that may value us as better, we then would never feel that they are ever gonna be good enough. Are we then, running in circles, trying to catch our own tails?

I really don't know, I wish I do. But to the boy in my dream, I hope that he is doing very well =).

 

Last but not least,

Happy Chinese New Year everyone! And I wish you all a great year to come!!!!

 

Sometimes I wonder how some people can have only dollar sign in their eyes. They breath it and they live it. Like an animal predator that quietly awaits in the forest, waiting to "snap" a victim anytime possible.

So this "friend" of my relative has agreed to help out in renting my relative's house out and he will get some good commissions. Then the house was rented, but no $$ was ever deposited into the bank account. SO time goes by, my relative has finally decided to call and politely inquire about what is going on with the house. ANd then this "person" said, "you are aboard, you are making lots of money, why do you care about this little $$ here. you don't need it..blah blah.." And the owner of the house had to call up this dude once a year to "beg" for maybe 2 months worth rent to be deposited.......somehow..this house has become this "friend's" personal property, he rents it out all he wants but no or little money is ever deposited to the account.

I am Chinese myself but I just can't stand how some Chinese people try to take advantages of others (even those they called friends) in anyway they can. I really want to ask this "friend", are there no morals in you? Do you not have any integrity or honesty in you? I wonder, what has eaten away that little bit of good human nature that was born with you?

 

Without any principles or morals, what are you anyway?

I don' t know...but whatever you are, you are less than human.......

My second last semester has finally started and I have finally decided that 5 commerce courses (two accounting and three finance) will probably kill me before I even know it so I have dropped one of them =). Feeling much relieved, I have decided that I would really work very hard this term to ensure that I'll get good grades (and we will see if I am sticking to this one).

APEX, achieving professional excellence conference hosted by the Schulich School of Business at University of Toronto, is coming up soon. shall I go? shall I not? (If I do, I'll get to see 40 and my cousin and Toronto, um, tough call).

And I will get my first assignments to mark this coming Monday (can't wait). I must be crazy because I love marking assignments and hopefully I'll get the chance to teach in the coming semester as a teaching assistant =)

 

 

well, nothing more to report,

going to bed...going....going............going.....................................gone

I have finally finished cleaning my room. It took me at least 2 days, tho I have to admit that I was not up to speed in the first 12 days, just like when I study for final exams, moving from one end of extreme inefficiency to the other extreme.

 

My mom has taken pictures of my room before the big "make over" and no, I won't post them because you guys will be traumatized if I do...kekeke...and I have come across this little poem I have written when I was back in ESL (English as a Secondary Language), I thought I would share it, and please don't laugh at me, I was never a good writer and don't think i will ever become one =)

 

                                     The Lost Spirit

Searching and searching,

For the way out,

Darkness seems never to end

I can't see myself,

I don't know who I am

But I do know that I am waiting for the light,

Because - I am the lost spirit in the lost world

 

 

My teacher was then kind enough to write "marvelous" on the side of this poem and I don't know, I guess do feel like the lost spirit sometimes =).

 

Happy New Year!! and thanks for those of you have expressed your concerns, I am doing better now because of all of you!